Marry someone you want to annoy for the rest of your life.

∞ 355,065 notes

7/20/2014 (12:41pm) 182,192 notes



the pizza guy is gonna put tonight on his résumé

i made this post about the oscars and the pizza guy but now i’m sure that 95% of the ppl reblogging it now are thinking i fucked a pizza guy when i did not there has been a grave misunderstanding here my friends

(via beafrantic)

Act my age?
What the fuck is that, “act my age”?
What do I care how old I am?
The Ocean is old as fuck.
It will still drown your ass with vigor.

∞ 828,483 notes





here we have a picture of a majestic national treasure and the Washington Monument


Since Nic Cage will apparently do anything…why isn’t National Treasure a TV show…I would watch that every damn day forever.

(Source: spacehamsters)


Target Field during the HR Derby



Dear Tumblr,
Perhaps you don’t know the only fucking thing an anchor is designed to do. Just to be safe, I’ve fixed your tattoos for you. - Craig

if this doesn’t become a famous text post, i think i’d go insane…

(Source: popping-smoke, via techniciantraveller)

  • Movie stars: I look ten years younger than I actually am.
  • TV stars: I look older than my character is but you've known me for ten years so we'll move on.
  • Stage actors: I look older than my character is but you can't see me so I don't care.
  • Aaron Tveit: I look 15, 20, 25, 30, 35...

7/13/2014 (11:19pm) 1,483 notes

7/13/2014 (10:19pm)

"That guy just broke so many rules and laws in 1 second…I don’t even know how to yell at him." -Quote from work today. Lifeguard woes.

7/13/2014 (10:02pm) 150,141 notes






tragic backstories explain bad deeds but they do not excuse them

  • tragic backstories explain bad deeds but they do not excuse them





A+ gif use

Backstories that explain actions but don’t excuse them are what makes characters great.

(Source: brella, via freewheelingsherlockian)

7/13/2014 (9:37pm) 51,028 notes


Ok you won a world cup but you still lost two world wars so chill

(via jomilitum)

  • Friend: So how do you think you've changed since high school?
  • Me: Well I became aware of oppressive power structures and how we are complicit in them and now seek to dismantle them.
  • Friend: ...
  • Me: I also think I got hotter.

7/13/2014 (9:37pm) 110,391 notes